These 10 Things Can Secretly Destroy Relationships

Photo by Vera Arsic from Pexels

Relationships aren’t always rainbows and happy days. With any relationship you have in your life there will be days when you argue because let’s face it we are human. No one is perfect and no relationship is perfect.

There are many reasons why a couple decides to call it quits. Often times we overlook the small things in life which can cause more damage than the larger problems. Below are some things in life that may cause a strain in your relationship.

Lack of listening skills…

Feeling like everyone word you say is falling on death ears can become a huge problem. Everyone wants a spouse that will be their shoulder to cry on and the person they can vent to after a long day. If you aren’t attentive to what your spouse is saying that can make your spouse feel unappreciated.

When the fun is gone…

A relationship should be fun. Of course as the years go by it is normal for a relationship to lose it’s spark. Which is why it is so important to continue having fun and creating memories together. If the relationship becomes repetitive and the fun is now non existent that is a relationship killer. Make an effort to keep the relationship fresh by trying new things. No matter how long you have been together never stop having fun with your spouse it is so important.

Sorry, I have to cancel again…

Constantly cancelling and forgetting about plans is one way for your spouse to separate from the relationship. The saying “people make time for who and what they want.” Your spouse can grow tired of the missed dates and feeling as if they aren’t a priority in your life. Make time for your spouse! Everyone has super busy schedules but show your partner that you cherish them by taking time out of your busy schedule.

Dismissing partner’s feelings…

Not giving your partner an opportunity to express their feelings is not healthy communication. No one should feel misunderstood or alone when it comes to their emotions. By brushing off your partners emotions you make them feel small and unimportant. Listen to your partner and acknowledge their feelings. Often times we forget that we listen to “understand” not to “respond.” Be that listening ear that your partner deserves and put fourth an effort to actually understand their perspective of things.


No communication…

Space is extremely important in relationships! But, you have to find the balance between knowing when it is too much space and just the right amount. Going days without reaching out can make your partner feel lonely. There is no rule on how often you and your partner should communicate but make sure that your partner isn’t feeling neglected.

Lack of affection…

Where is the love? Lack of affection can lead to your partner feeling unloved and unimportant. Intimacy is a major key in any relationship that you have. It is a basic need that every human needs within their relationships. Keep the intimacy alive! Figure out your partners love language and how they express intimacy.

Holding on to the past…

Holding on to past mistakes can prevent the relationship from moving forward. If you both agreed to leave the past behind and you contentiously bring it up is a huge red flag. You have to forgive yourself and others or it will be difficult to stay in the relationship. Let it go and continue moving forward together not backwards.


Emotionally absent partner…

Having no connection with your partner and lacking emotional intimacy is a definite relationship deal breaker. Showing lack of support, emotion, or being distant towards your partner can lead to feeling unwanted emotions. Your partner should not feel lonely even when you spend time together. If your partner is emotionally unavailable you have to have patience and express your needs in the relationship. Or, you should end the relationship and connect with someone who can give you what your heart desires.

Failure to defend spouse…

Everyone wants a partner who will protect, defend and stick up for them. Having a partner who has your back makes you feel safe and secure within the relationship. Having a partner who you feel that isn’t supportive and doesn’t have your best interest will cause a division between you two. Which will cause more arguments and the trust you have built will start to be questioned by your partner. Reassure, validate and defend your spouse when need be.

Always giving but never receving…

Constantly pouring into your spouse and not receiving anything in return can be draining. If your spouse is giving more than you this creates an unbalance within your relationship. No one wants to put out more than they are receiving. Step up and show the same effort that your partner is putting out or you run the risk of losing your relationship.

Comment down below any small things that you’ve discovered that secretly destroys relationships. I would love to hear your opinions 🙂

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